I lost my daughter, Elle, on July 22, 2018. And somehow, a few days later, I experienced one of the most intense moments of joy of my life.
Here was this girl who, with her birth, had stretched my capacity for joy, and now, with her death, was stretching my capacity for grief. And I was overcome with appreciation for this soul who had given expanded my capacity to experience my life.
That moment became my True North. I realized then that while I would always be a guy who had lost a daughter, I didn't have to be the guy who'd lost his daughter. I could choose to hold this experience with appreciation, which brought in joy along with the grief.
Scar Jar is where I hold my grief. Holding it this way reminds me that I have the power to bottle it: it's something I can experience on my terms, it doesn't have to rule me.
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